Another of my favorite examples of relationship building shows that results can happen quite fast.  A client had an issue with some products being imported into the United States from China.  The issue centered around whether the seller of the products paid a certain license fee.  The licensor had a reputation for being very aggressive in these cases, usually requiring immediate destruction of the allegedly infringing goods.  Fearing a multi-million dollar loss and knowing that the products were in fact licensed, my client immediately traveled to the port.  While in the coffee shop, my client struck up a conversation with the person sitting next to him.  After chatting for a while, they both left and coincidentally walked to the same building.  My client happen to ask if this person knew the customs official he was looking for and my client’s new friend said absolutely.  Unknowingly, my client had just befriended one of the most senior customs officials at the port.  That short relationship building exercise in the coffee shop allowed my client to quickly work with the right people to clarify the error and get the products released.

Building relationships can happen in various environments and through different formats — in person, networking, online and in other ways.  Ethos Business Law client, LoopDesk, has developed a useful and innovative online business-to-business networking tool that allows companies to build relationships in a way that many other social media sites do not.  If you are interested, you can click here to learn more about LoopDesk and take advantage of an advertising special they are offering.

Whether you build relationships through personal networking, online networking, social media or through other ways, building relationships is a lifelong process that will build and evolve you brand.  Start building and maintaining relationships today and they will be very valuable in your future business dealings.

Unfortunately, Minnesota Nice isn’t really about being “nice” at all. It’s more about keeping up appearances and avoiding confrontation.  Moreover, it can also be used as a negotiation tool, which causes confusion, misunderstanding and frustration among other participants.  So, what do you do when you are in a negotiation and you are confronted with “Minnesota Nice?”  Here are a few tips:

• Keep the negotiation focused on the issues, not the people.  This will help diffuse any potential personal confrontation.
• Be open and upfront, and expressly ask the same of other participants.
• Think bigger than the pie.  You don’t just have to cut the pie into pieces — expand the pie so that everyone is satisfied.
• Make sure you understand where each negotiator is coming from — their frame of reference.  This will give you insight into how to effectively negotiate with them.
• Plan properly for the negotiation.  Make sure you are prepared to deal with various scenarios prior to the actual negotiation.

Keep in mind the ultimate goal, to have a successful result to your negotiation. To accomplish this goal, all parties must “win.”  While each party will independently define what a “win” is to them, these negotiating tips may help you work through your next encounter with Minnesota Nice.

Please share your negotiating experiences and tips.

Interest-based negotiation is a strategy in which parties work to find a win-win solution to a dispute.  A form of interest-based negotiation was described in the book, Getting to Yes, by outlining four fundamental principles: (1) separate the people from the problem; (2) focus on interests, not positions; (3) invent options for mutual gain; and (4) insist on objective criteria.  These principles should be observed at each stage of the negotiation and adapted based on the other party’s response.

When a negotiation goes wild, think about and apply these principles:

• Are there personality conflicts or are responses to issues viewed as personal attacks.  If so, separating the people from the problem can take the sting out of the subject-matter and place the focus on the issues, not the people.
• If the negotiation is focused on positions, one party must lose.  It can be hard to save face in a loss.  Instead, focus on interests so that you can find a solution that satisfies both parties’ interests.
• Has the negotiation fallen prey to the “either-or” problem.  If so, you may not have considered alternative options.  I have yet to see a situation where there are only two possibilities.  Think creatively to find options, don’t focus your energy on proving the other party wrong.
• When interests are directly opposed, use objective criteria to resolve differences.  If you allow differences to spark a battle of wills, you will destroy relationships, waste time and not resolve the dispute.  If you define objective criteria, you will be more likely to agree on a resolution.

Of course, it can be very challenging when one party insists on using a position-based approach.  In my experience, I find that continuing to use an interest-based approach can be effective over time.  By focusing on the interests, you can often engage a position-based negotiator in an interest-based discussion.  Of course, at some point and with some people, these strategies may not be effective and you may need to try other approaches.  However, I think interest-based negotiation is a very important tool and can help resolve many difficult negotiations.  What do you think?